Why you REALLY get annoyed

Do you sometimes feel annoyed at those around you because they don’t do what you think they should do, or they don’t do it “the right way”?
​
Do you feel you need to “micro manage”, or everything will burn down around you because you feel responsible for so many things?
​
For example, that the right trash gets in the right recycling bins so the bin men don’t leave it behind? That whoever cooks uses the “right” ingredients? That money gets transferred in time so extra fees don’t get applied? That the baby has matching socks on? That the plants get taken properly care off, so they can look green and lush?
​
Anything you recognize here, or do you have other issues where you feel you HAVE TO control that it gets done properly, or everything will go wrong?
​
If you’re like this, it’s likely you will get irritated and frustrated almost out of proportions when things don’t go “your way”. This will affect your relationships, and you might find yourself struggling, although when you break it down you can see you’re not being completely rational.
​
I want to invite you to look at what happens if “everything goes wrong”. What does that look like? Take it all the way out, like this:
​
If the baby doesn’t have matching socks on, people will see it and might think we’re not responsible parents ( hidden underlying thought: I should have made sure they matched, I’m a bad mum)
​
If my kids don’t use the right ingredients I had laid out for them when they have to cook, the food won’t taste right, not be as nutritious and we might have to bin some of the stuff they didn’t use because it will go off ( underlying: I should have checked in on them, it’s really my fault and I’m a terrible and irresponsible mum)
​
And so on…
If you’re a woman, it’s likely you’re taking on a lot of responsibility, and when things don’t go perfect, you’re a master at beating yourself up!
​
So what really makes you feel anxious and frustrated, is not the little things that when you think back REALLY are not that important, but the fact that now it’s a free-for-all beat yourself up and find more evidence of how irresponsible/careless/imperfect you are.
​
The freedom lies in being aware of these underlying thoughts, and learn to have so much more compassion and flexibility towards yourself.
​
They can be hard to discover, but if you write down each issue as I just did, and take it aaaall the way to worst case scenario, and keep asking “but why?” - you’re likely to uncover them. THEN you can decide if you want to keep that way of thinking, or maybe work on relaxing a bit and noticing what comes up for you when everything doesn’t look like in the movies.
​
If you’d like some help discovering where you’re beating yourself up, and how to stop doing it, reach out for a free consult and I’ll show you how :)

In your corner,

Gunila

If you'd like to book, click here: https://calendly.com/gunila-lifecoach/50-minute-free-coaching-consultation