What if no one tells you you're doing a good job?
Hi ! What happens when we do our best to be a good vet, but no one sees us or tells us we've done a good job? It can be discouraging to work hard to save a pet or even just be on top of the day to day at a busy clinic and not get any validation from anyone. It's easy to fall into a pit of "why bother?", and lack the motivation to go to work and show up the best we can. It is human condition to want reassurance that we're good enough, and know we're valuable members of our community, whether this is society in general or the clinic we work at. There are a few aspects of this. First, you've got to be aware of the negativity bias everyone around you lives by. It is MUCH easier for humans to focus on what's NOT working, than pay attention to what's going well. If the pet owners and managers around you are not aware of this, they will not even SEE all your good work because their brains are so busy with "Yes but she didn't do the anal glands!!" (pet owners) or "why is she running behind consults again??" (manager, when you've squeezed in extra 3 clients in order to try to please everyone). It's important YOU are aware of this so you don't make it mean anything about you and your value as a vet. Of course it would be nice if all veterinary leaders were emotionally intelligent and knew all these things, but here we are, with what you've got right now. Pet owners are often so frazzled and worried that they don't have the surplus energy to show you gratitude; again nothing against you and your veterinary skills. The other aspect is your ability to see yourself as the amazing vet you truly are. When we 100% know and believe we're the bees knees in veterinary medicine, we don't NEED anyone else to tell us. Snoop Dog doesn't need anyone to tell him he's talented. When you can get the validation you need from the one place that truly matters; yourself, then you don't depend on anyone else to feel good. It's still NICE getting a box of chocolate from happy owners, or pizza from an appreciative boss, but you don't NEED it to feel valuable. It doesn't come natural to us, especially vets as we have a tendency to self criticism and feeling like an impostor half the time. But you can work on it by being aware of YOU having a negative bias against yourself and your surroundings. Learn to celebrate all the small and big wins in your day to day. And learn to focus on even the smallest sign of gratitude and appreciation from others, so you become more and more aware of it, as opposed to fixating on all the times it DOESN'T happen. P.S: If you want help handling this, then remember you can try out a free coaching consultation with me! You can book that free session here |