There's a troll in my home!!! 🧌

There's a troll in my home!!!🧌

…Is something we expect to hear in a Harry Potter or Lord of the Rings movie, but not in real life, right? 🧙🏽

Well, in a sense, we can expect them, in the form of internet trolls.

I have been asked for advice on how to handle social media, and a few examples have come up lately, so I think it’s something we need to address and be aware of.

There are several aspects of this, and I’ll make a post on each, so you can be well prepared and practise what I teach easily.

There are of course the obvious legal aspects, which are not totally clear as this is so new,, and the tech stuff, such as limiting comments etc, which is not my speciality and you should definitely do your own research on this.

Once you’ve set up the legal and technical boundaries you are capable of, the next step is to set up personal boundaries, and that’s what I’m going to talk about today.

First of all, you want to set up a boundary for where and when you want to be exposed to the internet. A colleague told me about checking out Facebook just before a romantic dinner with her husband, only to come across a post complaining about her clinics non-existing out of hours service, + everyone else’s opinion on this. This put her in a state of mind spinning and defensiveness that lasted the whole dinner, much to her husband's dismay.

You want to be extremely conscious and in control of when you’ll allow yourself to be exposed if possible, and it can be as easy as to not open the door to the trolls once you’re off work, near dinner or bedtime, etc. Nothing you do or say will change people’s opinion anyway, and you’ll likely end up not sleeping well nor be able to enjoy your meal. You can’t be on the internet 24/7 trying to protect yourself or your business.

How will you decide what the best boundary is for you? You might not be practised at this, and normally just roll with the flow letting everything in at all times. Then you want to take a guess, and go with it. You will have to experiment and see what works. It’s a bit like starting up a new routine, like running or learning French: you have to take baby steps and assess what works for you. I can tell you it’s probably best to avoid checking social media late in the day, like around dinner time or just before bed, because your brain is likely to over dramatise the issue and spin in it all night thinking about aaaalll the things you should or shouldn’t have said…

So, decide right now when and how you’re going to set your boundary to make sure the troll cannot access you at your most vulnerable and make you feel exposed, in your own home, in your own time.

Let me know if you’re unsure how to do this, and if your brain is screaming at you that you NEED to be on 24/7 so you can protect yourself. I’d also love to hear what experiences you’ve had with trolls, and how you handled them. Just respond to this email - I read all the answers I get.

Next week I'm addressing how to cope with the actual troll - once you open up your phone or computer and it's there, black on white.

In your corner,

I know coaching can help anyone. I know as veterinarians, especially women, we tend to talk ourselves down, feel guilty, and struggle with setting boundaries, and so many more issues. All of our experiences can be bettered by coaching. I will show you it doesn’t have to be so hard and that you can enjoy your work no matter what. Reach out HERE for a free consult and find out how.