Solving for the wrong problem will get you the wrong result

By Gunila Pedersen • • 3 min read

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Schools are to blame for a lot of our discontent and anxiety, really.

We are taught in a way that makes us believe that the way from A to B looks like:

A —--—————————>B

And if we just follow the steps as we are taught, in the right order, we succeed, get good marks, and people are happy with us.

When, actually, life is more like /////..<<””<***^^>>//???, and very little —-------.

And then we think there’s something wrong with us, and we must be doing it wrong, and if we just try HARDER, we’ll have more of —---------------- to where we want to go.

They don’t teach us that life is 50/50.

That the human experience is messy and weird and wonderful and difficult all at the same time. And it’s ok that your life is like that, and it doesn’t mean anything has gone wrong.

The problem is, when life is not going in a straight line, we think:

  • There’s something wrong with me
  • I don’t know how to do it the “right” way
  • I’m not where I’m supposed to be
  • I’m not with the right people/spouse/partner

We don’t realise we can treat the root problem, which is us making a problem out of a normal human life. And then our brains try to solve for a problem which is really not problem, going to “fix” our current situation, what we can see, to try to feel better:

  • Change jobs (it’s the job that’s making me feel “not right”)
  • Get a divorce (it’s my spouse that’s not inspiring me anymore)
  • Have an affair (a new and exciting person will make me feel alive)
  • Move to another city/country (a change of surroundings will help)
  • Marry (I’m fed up with being single, I need someone to make me feel better)

The issue with this way of trying to solve for our discontent and “feeling-not-quite-right” is that we’re NOT actually treating the problem, and we are doing all the above for the wrong reasons. So the problem will come along, like my cat Pus used to jump into my suitcase when he knew I was going travelling. And after a while, you’re back to feeling exactly the same again.

And then you jump to the conclusion there’s DEFINITELY something wrong with you; you can’t seem to properly settle anywhere and just be happy with your lot.

What if I told you you already have EVERYTHING you need to feel fulfilled and “right”?

That there’s nothing wrong with the way you’re doing things, and it’s NORMAL that 50% of the time life just … isn’t perfect (/////..<<””<***^^>>//???)?

And that you can learn to handle everything coming your way and break free of the idea that there’s ONE RIGHT WAY to do things (like we were taught in school all the way from kindergarten)?

If you’re feeling stuck in your current life, job or relationship.

If you think in order to feel better you’d have to make huge scary changes in your life.

I can help you by showing you where your root problem is, so you can solve for the REAL issue, and then go (or not go) wherever you want, without carrying it with you.

Reach out for a free consult and get a head start, as already in that first, free session we’ll get to an overview of exactly where you are, and where you want to get to.

In your corner,

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